I've been putting off writing a post, mostly because everyone else seemed to be writing about New Year's Resolutions and I haven't felt very inspired to make any of my own.  Last year, I sat down and filled out goals for 2015 for different areas of my life (spiritual, physical, family, work, etc.) and as 2015 came to a close, sadly most of my goals remained unmet.  Instead of looking at that paper with a sense of satisfaction, there was a sense of failure. 
The week between Christmas and New Year's, Ivan's 5 siblings and respective spouses and children all gathered here in Shell to celebrate.  It was the kind of family chaos that most of us know; kids screaming and laughing, lots of talking around the dinner table, reliving old stories, more people than beds, etc.  It was a week that unfortunately I did not walk through very gracefully.  The laid-back plan making, the late nights, the crowded kitchen, the bathroom always being occupied, the jam-packed cars, it all just kind of compiled and overwhelmed me.  I wish I could say, that I handled it all in a gracious and joyful attitude, but the truth is that I didn't.  My 1+ years here in Ecuador, still haven't loosened me up enough to just "go with the flow".  I wish I could say that at least I did a good job of pretending, but I didn't even do that.  I think that's kind of how I feel about the whole year 2015.  I haven't handled it with the most gracious or joyful attitude and I haven't even done a very good job of pretending.  I've been more like a 2-year old having tantrums.  It's embarrassing and it's not pretty.  When trials and tests came my way, I did not pass them with flying colors.  When God gave me opportunities to die to self, I clung even tighter to my pride. 
So, when Ivan handed me a new paper to write goals for 2016, I was less than thrilled.  We so often fail in our attempts but God never does.  He always follows through.  He is full of compassion.  He is full of mercy.  He is full of grace.  Where we see failure, God sees opportunity. 


Ivan and the nephews

We went to a place called the "Laguna Azul" with Ivan's family.  (As you can see by the picture we were fully equipped for swimming with some improvised life jackets.)  All three boys stood there shivering yet full of excitement as Ivan explained how they were going to cross to the other side and swim by the waterfall.


Ivan carrying one nephew across

Only it turned out they would need more than just a pool noodle to get there.  As our nephew failed to get to the other side on his own, instead of it being a failure, it became an opportunity for him to trust Ivan to take him to the other side.  It became an opportunity for him to be carried.  I think it's a great picture of how God is with us.  He has plans for our lives that perhaps scare and excite us at the same time.  If we are willing to take the leap and follow Him, we get to see and experience something larger than life.  Sometimes along the way we need to be carried and we need to trust Him.  So, as I think about what goals to write down for 2016, I want to take the leap (even if it doesn't always look very graceful), and trust Him.  I think it's okay to say, like my nephew, "I'm scared." and hold on a little tighter.  But I want to come to the end of 2016 and stand in awe of the works of His hands. 

All smiles!